It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize