at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
