Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
