you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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