Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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