It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
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