he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
