arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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