I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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