Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
is it fun? or sober?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
