bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
