at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Randomize
