Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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