remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Randomize