you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
