Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize