So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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