I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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