I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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