sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
