If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
