I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
This is classic penis vs brain.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
you never un-have a 4some
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
