actually, I'm a sock model
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
