I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
