Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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