my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
