How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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