I just saw a hot homeless man
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
