It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
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