Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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