Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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