So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
