i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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