Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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