I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
