dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
