i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
It's rum buckets o'clock
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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