Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
This is the high leading the old right now
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
