sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
