i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
