Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
