C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
