the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
