Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
