help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
