your parents love me but you hate me
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize