We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
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