he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
