Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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