I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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